OpenSourceJokes.com http://opensourcejokes.com Giggle your pants off. Wed, 19 Nov 2008 04:35:09 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.0.2 en Geek Chick Great Tits….What else could you want?! http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/geek-chick-great-titswhat-else-could-you-want http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/geek-chick-great-titswhat-else-could-you-want#comments Wed, 19 Nov 2008 04:35:09 +0000 Dazman PictureGeekgirlfriendHTMLtitswhitewifewillie stroker http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/geek-chick-great-titswhat-else-could-you-want Geek Chick Great Tits Blond Tits

Boy. Websites just became a hell of a lot more fun. Tits are great, geeky chicks have personality, Jeans are sticky. Enjoy the filth you crazy animals.

I think I just thought of a few new tags that could be introduced. Maybe for another time.

Originally from Techy Shit

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The Magazine for the Common Man http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/uncategorized/the-magazine-for-the-common-man http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/uncategorized/the-magazine-for-the-common-man#comments Mon, 03 Nov 2008 11:06:21 +0000 Dazman Uncategorizedmagazinemalemanpussy whippedunder the thumbwhipped http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/uncategorized/the-magazine-for-the-common-man Whipped Magazine - The Magazine for Men

We’ve all been there gentleman, at least now we have a place to get better at it.

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Nursery Rhymes for Modern Kids http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/nursery-rhymes-for-modern-kids http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/nursery-rhymes-for-modern-kids#comments Mon, 08 Sep 2008 06:52:45 +0000 Dazman Picture Jokediabetesgeorgie porgieglobal warmingjack and jillnursery rhymes http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/nursery-rhymes-for-modern-kids Rain Raining Pouring
It’s Raining, It’s Pouring
Oh sh!t, it’s Global Warming.

Jack and Jill went up the hill
Jack and Jill went into town
To fetch some chips and sweeties.
He can’t keep his heart rate down
And she’s got diabetes.

Mary Had A Little Lamb
Mary had a little lamb
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her
Between two chunks of bread.

Mary Had A Little Lamb
Mary had a little lamb
It ran into a pylon.
10,000 volts went up its @rse
And turned its wool to nylon.

Georgie Porgie Pudding and Pie
Georgie Porgie Pudding and Pie
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
When the boys came out to play
He kissed them too cause he was gay.

Jack and Jill went up the hill
Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
And planned to do some kissing.
Jack made a pass
And grabbed her ass
Now two of his teeth are missing.

Mary Had A Little Lamb
Mary had a little lamb
Its fleece was white and wispy.
Then it caught Foot and Mouth Disease
And now it’s black and crispy.

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End of the Rainbow http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/end-of-the-rainbow http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/end-of-the-rainbow#comments Thu, 10 Apr 2008 22:33:48 +0000 dobbo Picturebeerleprechaunpot of goldrainbowreligiousshop http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/end-of-the-rainbow The following picture really struck a chord with me. I’m not into mussy stuff or religious stuff, but now I believe I have had an experience, call it a religious experience if you must. The picture is a message of hope, kindness, peace and joy. Perhaps I have over thought this image and it is merely a representation of what the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow is. But please take a moment to reflect on this image and let me know your thoughts.

Beer Rainbow

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Office Upskirt http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/movie/office-upskirt http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/movie/office-upskirt#comments Fri, 28 Mar 2008 01:38:01 +0000 Dazman Movieadvertisingcommerciallucky daymenofficephotophoto copyupskirtupskirt photowomen http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/movie/office-upskirt This guy gets a brilliant surprise. It sure beats John from Accounts photo-copying his wang and sending it to the older ladies around the office.


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The International Council of Man-laws http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/joke/the-international-council-of-man-laws http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/joke/the-international-council-of-man-laws#comments Wed, 19 Mar 2008 23:40:41 +0000 Dazman Jokealcoholballscouncilgutsgymnasticslawlawsman lawsmenwomen http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/uncategorized/the-international-council-of-man-laws 1. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2. It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her Blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss’s car.

3. Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.

4. Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

5. If you’ve known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.

6. Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy’s fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

7. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man.

8. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest

9. When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who’s playing

10 You may fart in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of fart entertainment, she’s officially your girlfriend.

11 It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you’re sunning on a tropical beach … And it’s delivered by a topless model and only when it’s free.

12 Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.

13 Unless you’re in prison, never fight naked.

14 Friends don’t let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

15 If a man’s fly is down, that’s his problem, you didn’t see anything.

16 Women who claim they ‘love to watch sports’ must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

17 A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

18 Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that’s just greedy.

19 If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you’d better be talking about his choice of beer.

20 Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she’s withholding sex pending your response.

21 Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
A) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
B) C’mon, give me one more! Harder!
C) Another set and we can hit the showers!

22 Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing (I.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc.). For all other
situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.

23 Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.

24 The morning after you and a girl who was formerly ‘just a friend’ have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you’re feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion occurs about what a big mistake it was.

25 It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.

26 Thou shalt not buy a car in the colours of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.

27 The girl who replies to the question ‘What do you want for Christmas?’ with ‘If you loved me, you’d know what I want!’ gets an
Xbox. End of story.

28 There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men’s Gymnastics. Ever.

29 We’ve all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below:

‘GUTS’ is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say, ‘are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?’

‘BALLS’ is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say, ‘You’re next Fatty!’

We hope this clears up any confusion.

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Spoiled Photo http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/spoiled-photo http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/spoiled-photo#comments Fri, 08 Feb 2008 22:10:42 +0000 dobbo Picturebeachbikinisdick dazzlersfathotsexyspeedoswaterwomen http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/spoiled-photo Spoiled pic of bikini clad ladies by a fat dude in speedos

Man I can’t believe this dude in all his dicky dazzler glory ruined this photo of gorgeous bikini clad women. Ok its not that funny but hey when I had an opportunity to post women in bikinis I jumped at the chance.

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Ninjas http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/ninjas http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/ninjas#comments Fri, 01 Feb 2008 03:31:22 +0000 dobbo Picturedance partydancingdiscodrinkkissingNinjaninjas http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/picture/ninjas Ninjas

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Japanese Game Show Mania #5: Playing Football With Binoculars http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/movie/japanese-game-show-mania-5-playing-football-with-binoculars http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/movie/japanese-game-show-mania-5-playing-football-with-binoculars#comments Thu, 15 Nov 2007 03:33:07 +0000 Dazman Moviebinocularsfootballgame showjapanjapanesesoccersportsports http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/movie/japanese-game-show-mania-5-playing-football-with-binoculars

The Japanese have made some amazing discoveries and inventions. This beats the lot. Kudos.

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Japanese Game Show Mania #4: Treadmill Madness http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/movie/japanese-game-show-mania-4-treadmill-madness http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/movie/japanese-game-show-mania-4-treadmill-madness#comments Mon, 29 Oct 2007 22:30:00 +0000 Dazman Moviebig brothergame showjapanjapanesesurvivortreadmill http://opensourcejokes.com/jokes/movie/japanese-game-show-mania-4-treadmill-madness Running on a treadmill is an arduous task at the best of times. Looking around the streets most days can tell you that not many people are too keen on hitting up the old stationary foot-path. These contestants have been given an even greater task…actually move forward on the treadmill, and while doing so jump over hurdles. I know, imagine pitching that to a TV studio, but there should be more of it instead of Big Brother’s Idol Fantasy with a Survivor from Pirate’s Cove, as it is piss funny.


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